* Apropiati
Coming Back to Center in a Relationship
Anyone in a long-term relationship knows that the dance of intimacy
involves coming together and moving apart. Early in a relationship,
intense periods of closeness are important in order to establish the
ground of a new union. Just as a sapling needs a lot more attention
than a full-grown tree, budding relationships demand time and
attention if they are to fully take root. Once they become more
established, the individuals in the union begin to turn their
attention outward again, to the other parts of their lives that
matter, such as work, family, and friendships. This is natural and
healthy. Yet, if a long-term relationship is to last, turning towards
one another recurrently, with the same curiosity, attention, and
nurturance of earlier times, is essential.
In a busy and demanding world full of obligations and opportunities,
we sometimes lose track of our primary relationships, thinking they
will tend to themselves. We may have the best intentions when we think
about how nice it would be to surprise our partner with a gift or
establish a weekly date night. Yet somehow, life gets in the way. We
may think that our love is strong enough to survive without attention.
Yet even mature trees need water and care if they are to thrive.
One of the best ways to nourish a relationship is through
communication. If you feel that a distance has grown between you and
your partner, you may be able to bridge the gap by sharing how you
feel. Do your best to avoid blame and regret. Focus instead on the
positive, which is the fact that you want to grow closer together.
Sometimes, just acknowledging that there is distance between you has
the effect of bringing the relationship into balance. In other cases,
more intense effort and attention may be required. You may want to set
aside time to talk and come up with solutions together. Remember to
have compassion for each other. You're in the same boat together and
trying to maintain the right balance of space and togetherness to keep
your relationship healthy and thriving. Express faith and confidence
in each other, and enjoy the slow dance of intimacy that can resume
between the two of you.
* Stress
"We are here on the planet only once, and might as well get a feel for
the place."
-- Annie Dillard
"Rest is not idleness, and to lie on the grass under trees on a
summer's day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the
clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time."
-- J.Lubbock
"People become attached to their burdens sometimes more than the
burdens are attached to them."
-- George Barnard Shaw
* Surpriza
enemies; probably because they are generally the same people.
-G.K. Chesterton
* Umor
in my name at a Swiss bank.
-Woody Allen
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